CoOpetition
by Mark962
Summary: The four Links begin an even more epic quest after defeating Vaati. The Quest: Every Legend of Zelda Quest, ever. Timeline in the first chapter.
1. Chapter 1 WALKING?

_All characters belong to Nintendo_

_Plot by me_

_Review or I will be sad and kill off one of the Links (if not more)_

_Muahahahahah._

_Timeline goes like this: Four Swords is first (because I wanted all four Links to be in all of the adventures), then Ocarina of Time, then Majora's Mask, followed by Wind Waker, Phantom Hourglass, and wrapping it all up, is Twilight Princess. If I write REALLY slowly, or if the story is long, Skward Sword might be included. Old School fans, sorry, there wasn't really enough plot for me to build the adventures on. Okay, story time._

_Clunk! Clunk!_ Link's boots landed on the table. Squirming in his chair, he adjusted the collar on his green tunic, sliding into a more comfortable position. As Link laced his fingers behind his head, someone else walked into the tent where he had set up temporary headquarters.

The man, as it had been a man at Link's inspection (really just a quick glance over his shoulder), had long blonde hair, dipping down over a single eyebrow. A single braid of hair hung down on both sides of his head, covering a section of his long, pointed ears. Deceptively wizened blue eyes looked out from a boyish face, reaching a rounded chin that lead to a skinny neck. His lean frame was covered by a cloth shirt placed under a tunic, hanging down over his waist, where a pair of white leggings was tucked under shin-high boots.

A mirror copy of Link! The only thing that set them apart was that the newcomer's shirt and tunic were red, as opposed to Link's green. A scowl covered the face of "Red Link". He sat down in a chair opposite the original, "Green Link". Drawing his portion of the legendary Four Sword, a 36" blade, curving inward at the center, then parting out again to a wide tip, forged in a mythical metal, with a golden hilt and pommel. A jewel was emblazoned into said pommel, the blade in Red's hand's jewel was a ruby, matching the color of his tunic.

Green's, likewise, was an emerald, though his blade remained in the sheath that hung over his shoulder. Red Link drew a blade-sharpening whetstone from a satchel that hung near his waist, and began to drag it along the edge of his sword. Pulling his ocarina out of a satchel very much like Red's, the original Link played a tune. Satisfied, Green Link closed his eyes, taking as long a rest as he could before- _ Purple Link jogged into the tent from outside._

"Where's Blue?" Purple Link asked.

_Great… _Green thought, taking his feet off the table. "I dunno. Red, you see him lately?"

"Oh, yeah. _Totally. _We had a fantastic conversation, deabating the finer points of Deku Shrub growth rates." Red Link growled back.

"Although you were _obviously _being sarcastic, the Deku Shrub has a slow growth rate, becoming larger and larger, until, eventually, they become rooted to a single spot, turning into trees. Ages later, the trees are incarnated into child-like immortals, which we know as Kokiri.*" Purple explained, casting a sidelong glance at Red.

"Fascinating. Tell me more, bookworm." Red rolled his eyes.

"Hey, cool it, Red." Link pointed in his general direction, eyes still closed. "Purp, talk less. It's not unreasonable that Red's annoyed."

"You wanna take me on, pretty boy?" Red stood up, challenging Green.

"Cool it, Hothead, or I might just have to take you up on your offer." Link's eyes opened. He stood up as well, sliding his chair backwards and into the tent's entrance flap.

"Both of you, please! Be reasonable!" Purple stood, trying to get between the hero and his red-clothed clone. The argument intensified, insults flying back and forth between the three. Suddenly, the trio was bathed in blue light.

The light seemed to solidify in a fog, wrapping around the three. They were lifted into the air, hanging helplessly. The fog began to clear, and the Link clad in blue stood in the tent, sword held parallel to his body, emblazoned sapphire glowing.

"Put. Me. Down." Red commanded.

"I would, but that would be hazardous to my health," Blue replied with a shake of his head. Unfortunate to the blue sorcerer, the translucent blue coating that had covered the other three Links began to fade, and Blue's face paled, exhausted from the sustained levitation spell.

He started to back away, turning on his heel, when he was yanked backwards by his collar.

"Not so fast, spellslinger," Red growled into his ear. Blue gulped.

"You can kill each other _after _we reach the Lost Woods, okay?" Purple Link intervened.

"Fair enough…" Red mumbled, shoving Blue forward and onto the dirt.

"Um... anyway, back to the problem at hand…" Purple spoke to the other three. Walking over to the table, he pulled a map out of his satchel, planting it down on the surface. Green turned towards the tent flap, preparing to grab a few pebbles from outside to weigh the corners down, but Blue beat him to the point. With a flick of his fingers, a quiet humming noise could be heard.

A moment later, a handful of pebbles coated in blue floated into the tent. They positioned themselves down onto the corners of the map. Blue collapsed into his chair, breathing heavily, exhausted from the effort.

"Uh-huh…" Purple looked at the map. "Right. Unless there are any _more_ diversions, maybe we can start talking tactics now?"

"Tactics?" Red snorted, "The only tactics I need are where to stand and who to stab."

Green rolled his eyes. "That's what _all_ tactics are, down to their simplest form." His eyes grazed along the tent, looking at his three clones. _I know I had to stop Vaati and all, but these guys seem like more trouble than they're worth!_ _Now that Zelda's _not_ made of stone, is it possible to return these guys to wherever they came from? _Link wondered. _No, no_. He erased the thought from his head. _I'd miss 'em too much._

"Yes, er, well, continuing from where Green left off, although most tactics might be like that, ours, at least this time, involve _walking_ as well. Is that too complicated to understand?" Purple droned, his eyes locked on Red Link during that last comment.

*Whether or not this is true, I based this fact on the _INCREDIBLE_ fanfic, Child Of The Sun. Seriously, check it out.

There will be action in later chapters (maybe chapter 2?) If you think they talk too much, too little, act out of character, or have any other notes, send me reviews. I plan to kill someone whether or not you review. Cross your fingers or convince me otherwise, I have some brutal death scenes in mind.

-Taking over the Internets one click at a time

Mark962


	2. Chapter 2 The Wet Hero

_Characters by Nintendo_

_Plot by me_

"Wh-wh-why are they c-c-called the L-Lost W-w-woods?" Blue Link shivered out of fear.

"Heh, heh, 'cause by the time they find you, the demons that live here will have sucked your soul out your nostrils." Red sounded as solemn as he could, which wasn't that much. It was enough to make Blue wet his pants, however.

"Oh, for crying out loud…RED, WHAT'D YOU DO THIS TIME?" Green yelled from up ahead, where he was scouting. He had smelled celery, which was odd, considering they hadn't packed any celery. So, he concluded, it was piss. Who would piss? Blue. Who would cause it? Red.

"OH, COME ON! NOT MY FAULT HE'S SUCH A CRYBA- OOF!" Red was slammed into a tree, wisps of blue smoke trailing off the hero with wet pants.

"This is going to end badly…" Purple mumbled to himself. He jogged up towards Green, hoping to avoid the confrontation. He would not be so lucky.

"AH!" Purple's body was slammed to the ground as Red threw his fist into Blue's face, sending him backwards and into the helpless purple scholar. Leaping on top of Blue, he began pounding his fists into the sorcerer's face, counting the strikes, and soon, the bruises.

_One, two, three, four… _Red's fists became the color of his tunic, drenched in the blood of Blue Link. Blue's eyes closed, but Red could still see the glowing of his pupils from behind his eyelids.

_Uh, oh. Keep hittin' him, or get away? Keep hittin' him, or get a-_ Red's indecision proved painful, as Blue sent a bolt of electricity into the chest of Red Link, sending him back flipping off of Blue, smoke trailing from his burnt tunic.

In a stroke of luck, Red landed on his feet, and, with a growl, charged back at Blue, drawing his sword as he did so. The sorcerer took a half step back, dug his heel into the dirt, and drew his sword, holding it diagonally across his chest, a defensive stance.

Red swung his sword in an overhead arc, drawing Blue's eyes to the sky. In his distraction, Red delivered a forward kick into Blue's chest, sending him backwards with a _snap!_

"Ouch, possible broken rib, there." Purple winced at Blue, while dusting himself off.

Green, hearing the mumbling of Purple, reached into his pack for medical supplies.

As they prepared for the impending injuries, Red and Blue began to circle each other. Blue was holding his sapphire jeweled sword awkwardly in his right hand, forced to use his main hand, his left, to shelter his ribcage, pushing magical sparks into the wound in an attempt to heal it.

Red swung his sword in a similar fashion as last time, but Blue was more prepared. As Red delivered the kick, Blue stepped out of the way, but the kick managed to catch him in the leg, bending his knee backwards with another snap. He collapsed to the ground, a sigh tearing itself from his lips.

Red waltzed towards Blue, with a smirk on his face.

"Get up so I can hurt you again." Red's gloating was cut short as a deku nut flew at high speeds, smacking him on the side of the head.

"Shrubs!" Green yelled, sliding the emerald sword from its sheath. Purple hung his head, sliding his amethyst-mounted blade into his hand.

"A shrub! Hardly!" A female voice scoffed.

"Huh?" Green tilted his head to the side in confusion.

With a thump, a girl landed next to him, repeating herself; "I said: A shrub! Hardly!"

Red, regaining consciousness, lifted his hat, holding it in one hand. With the other, he attempted to smooth his hair back, brushing leaves and twigs out of the blonde mess.

"Well, now. I can certainly say that, if you _were_ a shrub, you would be _the_ most _fabulous_ shrub I had ever seen. " He tried to be charming.

"Are you trying to be charming?" The girl stepped closer, batting her eyelashes.

"That depends. Are you liking it?" He puffed out his chest, attempting to look stronger.

"Well…actions speak louder than words…"the girl said. She stomped on his foot as hard as she could, even letting out a "YE-EAH!" battle cry, as she dropped her flirty guise.

As he bent over in pain, she kneed him in the head, sending him flying backwards and onto his rump.

"Argh…um..thanks." Blue slurred, still beat from the fight with Red.

The girl whirled on him: "Like you're any better! You fought him, too!"

"Wha-uh-yeah, but he-he, started it…" Blue mumbled under her stern gaze.

"As I recall, you slammed him into a tree, just for spooking you!" She lectured.

"Well, yeah!" Blue was getting angry. "That's because he made me piss myself!" He realized what he had just said. "Aaaah, shit."

The girl attempted to hold her angry face, but her lip began to quiver. She burst out laughing, and Purple and Green joined in at Blue's expense.

"Just patch me up before I bleed out all over the forest, okay?" Blue glanced at the laughing Green and Purple Links. Nodding his head, the original hero reached into his satchel and pulled out: a stick.

"A stick?" Blue asked.

"A stick?" Red asked.

"A stick?" the girl asked.

"Ah, a stick." Purple understood.

"Yeah, a stick. It's for you to bite down on, Blue. Why, you ask yourself? Well, because it will keep you from yelling in pain as I bend your knee back in place." Green lectured.

"Aaah, shit, again." Green placed his foot on top of Blue's, and, lacing his fingers behind Blue's knee, pulled with all his might.

Blue spit the stick out in a dash of stupidity, causing; "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH, DIN'S FIRE, GO FUCK YOURSELF GREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN!"

"Great…" The howl of wolfos in the distance put the heroes, and the mystery girl, on alert. The pounding of footsteps soon surrounded the four heroes, and the mystery girl.

"Oh, I'm Kiera, by the way." The mystery girl, er, Kiera, said.

"Fantastic. Talk later. Kill now." Red grunted, picking up his sword, and lifting the shield off his back. Green drew his sword and shield, and Purple did the same. Blue pulled himself up onto a nearby tree brach, fingers glowing with magical anticipation. He held his shield just in case, but his sword remained on the ground.

Red backed up into a more tactical position, stumbling over Blue's section of the Four Sword. With a wicked grin, he replaced the shield on his back, scooping up the sapphired (is that a word?) sword in his right hand. The bushes in front of them shook, and Kiera placed another deku nut in her slingshot's launching pocket. Red stood in the front, in all the action, but out of the slingshot's line of fire. Getting hit once was enough.

Purple and Green stood back to back, protecting each other's weakpoints. Blue stood up, wobbling slightly in the tree. He pointed his hand forward, index finger raised. He thought for a second, then withdrew his hand. He put it back out a second later, and instead of the index finger glowing, ready for magical attacks, it was the middle finger, ready to "flip the (magical) bird" at the incoming monsters.

The wolfos burst through the trees, and the scream of a tunic and hat-wearing, Four Sword-wielding, hero dying could be heard all the way in the Kokiri camp.

_Ooh, suspense. Which one is it? And uh, I dunno what else to put here, soooo, review please. Or else. What else? That's for me to know and you to turn around and find it staring in your face._

_ Taking over the internets one click at a time_

_ Mark962_


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